Can someone please put me out!!?!!

Lovely day ladies and gentlemen,
My apologies for not updating my website for July. I thank you all for your patient emails asking about them. However, it looks as if I am looking at August for updates. For you see, here in Washington state where I live we have been having a heat wave of sorts for the last few weeks. We Washingtonians typically melt at 80 degrees so our resolve has been seriously tested lately! So with my son constantly harping at me," Mommy I want to go swimming","Mommy set up the slip and slide", etc etc I have not been indoors much these days. The very idea of sitting in front of a hot computer for longer than short durations...hmmm..that would make me a glutten for punishment..HA...no further comment there*wink*. I tend to spend good concentrations of time on my website as it is imperative to me that what I am trying to express is well thought out and well read. With this heat as of late, not only am I hot but my mind hasn't been functioning well either.So again I ask for your patience.

Thank you and I wish you all "cool" thoughts!~

Sincerely and ice cream all around,

~breath{MS} aka ~hoovsies~

The blessing of being owned.

Good day everyone,

I felt compelled to write today about being owned and what it means to me.This is an incredibly emotional subject for me so I ask that you please bear with my ramblings.Thank you.

Being owned as a submissive woman.It goes so far beyond the obvious kink of the lifestyle, a title or a place in exsistence.In allowing myself to be owned so completely I have complete and utter freedom. I can fly freely as the full woman I was always meant to be, not what society dictates. All of the colors of my soul vibrate so wonderfully from me. I feel as if my body is actually singing.My step is lighter, my mind clearer of the clutter of life. I feel securely safe, watched over and possessed. Regardless of my mood, the kind of day that I am having or if I look like warmed over death I am accepted in total. I feel personal limit's that I have had for a lifetime being tested, challenged and eventually overcome. These limits not being sexual but the stuff of life.I grow, evolve and become wise. I need nothing and want for little. My soul finds satisfaction again in the little things that mean so much but can be so easily overlooked in a hectic world. I have renewed purpose not merely in serving my Seeker but different paths of direction are constantly opening up at my feet. I see the world as a place that I do not have to conquer or fit into. I see it as a vast mystery that I can absorb, learn from and nurture. My wing's glimmer in the sunlight and I fly unabashed and unhindered.

This blessing has been brought into my life by my Seeker, The Seeker of Enlightenment aka Monroe. This wonderful man came into my life and forever changed it.He is teaching me what a true dominant man is. Not merely the lifestyle definition but the epitome of a man in all his glory. He not only is a dominant that dreams are made of but a man whose foundation of self is based on self sacrifice, intelligence, honesty, growth, sincereity, intense care for others and just pure heart.We have saved each other from this cruel world. We love each other without conditions, lift each other up when life gets rough, support each other's opinion's and view's and grow as individual's and alone adding to the incredible intensity which is us. I always thought that miracles were only in the Old Testament, that was until I met and fell in love with my owner, my destiny, my Seeker. I am owned so completely and lovingly like a favorite childhood toy or memory. I am sacred, have worth and beauty in his eyes.I am slowly forging myself into perfection for him. I will have no less for the man who has completed my life so harmoniously,so wonderfully.

He loves and cares for my son when no other took the time. He understands his disability and rather than chastize him for it, he helps my son to work within what he is capable of. He has become a friend to my son and a person that my son turns to in times of crisis and uncertainty.My Seeker uses no tools, no learned behaviors...he simply and effortlessly just uses who he is as a human being and that to me is what a father figure should be.

My Seeker is a man who when I was sick and we were at a distance or he was traveling on business, sent me socks to keep my feet warm and medicine for my body. When the weather is unbearably hot, he sends me and my son to a hotel with air conditioning and pool to keep cool. He pays close attention to me and has sent my favorite movies for us to share,favorite perfumes or little things.When he thought I was not eating well enough he sent a food care package to me. When I was in pain and miserable he sent a heating pad, chocolates and love notes. When someone in my life caused me pain or stress, he personally spoke with them in a mature and firm tone to get them to cease. When my power was due to be shut off, he took care of that. When he felt my son was doing good in school, he would send money with directions to buy my son some toys to reward his good behavior. In learning one of my hardest lessons...reclaiming my femininity, he has been lovingly relentless. Sending me to buy clothes, make up and other girly things. He encourages each odd new apiphany that I have, that are now coming out of the woodwork unseen by me. Whether that be a desire to decorate cakes, gardening, surround myself in lavender, write stories, learn new recipes and new avenues of cooking,etc.He revels in my intelligence and humor and does not feel intimidated by them. He puts up with my daily stressful situations with ease.He is eternally patient and understanding knowing that I will learn my lessons and make my corrections in time.Seeker is the man I was born for and meant to love it just took 36 years to find him!

What I give him in return? My all, my everything,balance. My friendship, heart and soul.My troubles, my woes and my pain. My embarassments, failures and sucessess. My talents, my loving nature,my special gifts. I learn for him and constantly try to excel for him in everything.I give him my past and my future. I give him my trust, acceptance and authority.I am here forever through the good times and the bad.Each day is a new day in which to love him, explore him and make his life paradise a small step at a time. I make him smile when he is down, show him hope when he is uncertain. I give to him all of my job titles: cook, nurse, counselor,maid, lover,partner,seamstress, soulmate,accountant,budget balancer,madonna/whore,party planner,interior decorator,house cleaner,confidante, secretary and anything else he needs or desires in life. I am his, owned by this perfect man that I am cherished by. Graced with his presence in my life, in so many respects he is my own personal alpha and omega. I love you my Seeker and thank you for making my life blissful, purposeful and letting me rejoice in freely being a woman. I am proud to be yours.

Thank you for reading everyone and may your deepest dreams in this life come true!~

~breath{MS} aka ~hoovsies~

Hanging by a Moment- LifeHouse

Desperate for changing,

Starving for truth,Im closer to where I started,

Chasing after you.

I'm falling even more in love with you,letting go of all I've held onto,

I'm standing here until you make me move,

I'm hanging by a moment here with you.

Forgetting all Im lacking,completely incomplete,

I'll take your invitation,you take all of me.

Now,Im falling even more in love with you,letting go of all Ive held onto,

I'm standing here until you make me move,

I'm hanging by a moment here with you.

I'm living for the only thing I know,

I'm running and not quite sure where to go,

and I don't know what I'm tapping into,

Just hanging by a moment here with you.

There's nothing else to lose, nothing else to find,

There's nothing in the world,that can change my mind,

There is nothing else...

There is nothing else...

There is nothing else...

Desperate for changing,

Starving for truth,

I'm closer than where I started,

Chasing after you.

I'm falling even more in love with you, letting go of all I've held onto,

I'm standing here until you make me move,

I'm hanging by a moment here with you.

I'm living for the only thing I know,

I'm running and not quite sure where to go,

and I don't know what I'm diving into,

Just hanging by a moment here with you.

Just hanging by a moment,

Hanging by a moment...

Hanging by a moment...

Hanging by a moment here with you.

Rest in Peace forever, Zina!~

Today is a sad day. I and the team that I belong to, Amber Alert Mommy Squad have been following this case closely.It is with an incredibly heavy heart and baffled head that I bring you her story.

Zina Linnik was just a typical 12 year old enjoying the festivities of The Fourth of July with family and friends.Zina, whose family immigrated to the USA ten years ago to start a new life appreciated Independence Day moreso than the average person.On that Wednesday night Zina after being asked by her father to go outside to check to see if any other children in her family were in the alley(a safe place on this dead end road) behind their home, disappeared.Not just disappeared... but was forceably taken kicking and screaming. Her father rushing outside to barely catch a glimpse of a foreign man in an older gray van driving off quickly.Her father also caught a few numbers of the license plate on the van.An intense search began, an Amber Alert put into place.

Through diligent and tireless efforts of the Tacoma Police Department, its detectives and the FBI information was found several days later that pointed to a suspect.This suspect was found due to the facts that he had a similar van, the numbers the father had seen on the plate corresponded with the actual plate and that the suspect is an UNREGISTERED SEX OFFENDER. Not merely a sex offender but an offender of the worst kind, a sexual predator who had committed transgressions against children.

This suspect" alledgedly"( yes, I hate that word but in this country it is innocent until proven guilty) gave the authorities the whereabouts of Zina's body. Her body was found with the information provided by the "alledged" suspect on Thursday, July 12, 2007. As of this time, very little information is being given to the public. We know that this particular individual is a "person of interest", he is a convicted" sexual offender" who failed to register and possibly an illegal immigrant.He refused to cooperate with authorities further and ponied up an attorney quicker than you can bat an eyelash! Her body was recovered and at the time of my writing this, is being carefully examined as well as the undisclosed crime scene.I will post more information on this case as it is given to the public.More on this case at the following links:

http://www.komotv.com/news/8491402.html

http://www.komotv.com/news/local/8479002.html

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,289165,00.html

http://blogs.king5.com/archives/2007/07/terapon_adhahn.html

Why do I post about this one particular crime you may ask yourselves? This crime is to close to home for me. As a member of my AAMS, we take personally crimes in our own hometowns. Of course every missing, murdered and hurt child is of upmost importance to us.As we are all mother's, we are devasted when a child is endangered in any way.We do our best through our self created little network to spread the word as soon as a child goes missing in our state. Whichever mommy is closesest to the current case spreads the word via emails, telephone calls, instant messages, etc...Zina's case being within ten miles of my home. The goal is to spread the information as quickly as possible to other areas of the state to aid in Joe Public knowing what is going on as much in real time as we can. This may seem just a small thing( i.e posting flyers) and in most cases has no bearing in solving cases. But it is our way of doing SOMETHING and to maintain our sanity in the process.

I speak only of "sexual predators" within the "sexual offenders" category. You can get caught urinating behind a bush on the side of the road and be labeled a "sexual offender". You can be an 18 year old male and have consentual sex with a 17 year old female and be labeled a " sexual offender" etc, etc, etc. A "sexual predator" should be in a category all its own.I tend to have more mercy on those labeled "sexual offender" versus utter contempt for "sexual predators".

I am going to be blunt with my feelings and may be difficult for you to stomach.My feelings will seem irrational and perhaps they are. Then again, children being harmed and dying in this manner IS irrational.It angers me to no end that NOTHING is being done to change laws. Each year on petitions and ballots I see issues such as: property taxes, which politician deserves to be re-elected, who deserves a raise, which roads need to be fixed, tougher laws for cigarette smokers, etc. I see nothing by way of making stiffer sexual predator laws. Why? Who is benefitting from letting predators run rampant? Is this some twisted version of population control?? Are certain predators being kept secret as they are considered " productive members of society" therefore letting crimes go unsolved?Three strikes when someone hurts a child before prison? Ten years or less sentences for sexual predators for devasting a child for life or killing them? The best we can do is label sexual predators level 1, 2 or 3 and expect them to go out in the world and live a normal life? Are we as parents expected to look over our shoulder's consistently to see which person is licking their chops at our children?Why is nothing more permenant being imposed by way of the law to aid our exhausted police forces and departments? Why isn't anything more cruel than prison time, chemical castration and in some cases physical castration being given to those who hurt our children? The laws in place now are obviously not frightening sexual predators nor intimidating them to stop so why not give them a reason to be afraid of their actions? Punishments that truly fit the crime regardless of how cruel and inhumane they are? I could go on and on but I will stop here. My heart sometimes takes over and will ramble on at a senseless pace, for that you have my apologies.

I end this entry with the hope that Zinia and her family receive justice to the fullest extent. As with Zinia and all other children their only crime is being young. That bears repeating...their only crime...is being young. As I have stated before here, I will continue to post updates as they are made available.

In the meantime I will hug my son closer and tighter to me . I will continue to sound off the names that have left a permanent scar on my heart.Child victim's in my state who have not seen justice yet. They will never be forgotten and hope will forever reign.Please, never forget.

Jennifer Bastian...

Michella Welch...

Adreanna Jackson...

Teekah Lewis...

Sophia Juarez...

Misty Copsey...

Jane Clark County Doe...

William Downey...

Ronald Frye...

Tyler Inman...

Auburn Washington Jane Doe...

Lenoria Jones...

Jeffrey Klungness...

Edward Ramirez...

Shelby Wright...

The Anderson children...

...and many, many, many more.

July updates for the website.

Good day everyone,

Just a brief notice that the July updates for my website will be a few days delayed. My birthday is coming up this weekend and Seeker is sending me on a mini vacation for a few days to celebrate ( thank you, I love you!~). Also with the Independence Day holiday approaching and everything involved you can imagine how chaotic things can get. Rest assured, the pages will be updated as soon as possible and I continue to work on new pages.

Have a magnificent summer day!~,

~breath{MS} aka ~hoovsies~

Answering emails...femininity?

Hello and a wonderful summer day everyone,

My apologies for it being so long since my last post. Real life and a critically sick family member have kept me at bay from my writing pleasures and website. With that being said, I will answer a few emails pertaining to my site and/or my submission that I have received. All of the emails that I am answering here are pertaining to one topic: my femininity and how I choose to express it.

In several email's that I have received ( all from men) question's have been asked why my website which is based on D/s views and in part the BDSM lifestyle, is so frilly and girly. The answer should be simple to those of you who are either truly dominant or submissive...shouldn't it? As I have read in your email's you all seem adament that my site is not truly D/s. As I have no exploitive photos, tons of graphics with whips and chains nor are my writings smutty and subservient( these adjectives taken from your email's). Why should my choice in feminine expression on page's in my site be judged by your perceived illusions of what the ignorant masses say D/s is...all about sex?

If you sincerely understood the workings of a submissive woman you would have no question's as to the presentation of my website.Each graphic on my website was chosen to serve a purpose to walk hand in hand with the subject matter on that page.If you had looked deeper, you could have seen the connections.

For now, I give you a brief lesson to enlighten those of you who have written on to what true submission is to a woman.I believe it is necessary as you seem pidgeonholed to see that unless a woman spreads her legs verbally and graphically, she isn't a submissive.Here, through my eyes is a brief description of who a submissive woman is:

A submissive woman who has truly answered her calling within is a free and spirited soul. The beauty felt within isn't simply exuded out through new sexual inhibitions coming to the surface...that is merely one facet to the diamond.She lives her life differently, has new purpose and a rebirth of self. Society's preconceived notions of femininity and who we should be, become stripped away from her and she feels herself for the first time.The desire to give of herself by way of serving and nurturing is paramount.Her character and truest colors become known, savored and shared.Talents and passions not known to her or dreamed of before make themselves known.She both at the same time becomes a vunerable soft creature and a strong force to be reckoned with.Her desire for knowledge and growth drives her curiousity.Her capacity for loving and caring deepens.She yearns to find a safe place in this cold world where she is accepted completely and understood without question.A place to continue to evolve in her entirety...the embrace of one dominant's world. Once in his dominion she is free to be everything that she needs to be to feel whole.

So, why is my website so frilly and girly you ask? In my submission I am beautiful and I do not hide any of my colors. Those colors being dark and seedy or soft and feminine.My website is an extension of the intensity of my feminine nature.I am a pure female animal who is not afraid to show what has been released within me. The dark and seedy side? Well that is for my Seeker to mold, use and orchestrate with his mind and hands, my all belongs to him.

I see submission as an art form.To be shared on a canvas for all to see and interpret as they will.If your interpretation should be merely all games: sex, whips, pain, leather and exploitation, so be it. Art appreciation is truly in the eye of the beholder.I cannot help then to question, are you truly seeing the piece of art for all its depth as the artist intended or simply scanning it for something to appease your lustful eye and then move on to the next piece? If the latter than you do have my pity as you are missing some of the purest beauty this life has to offer.

A submissive exudes herself in many ways. Sure, she can be slutty, sexy and uninhibited. Only seeing women as a sexual plaything is cheap and shallow...a disease of the vanilla world.See the whole woman for what she is. She can also be elegant, classy, modest and meek.

In closing gentlemen, my opinion is that if you truly wish to understand femininity and submission then educate yourselves. If you are only seeking to gratify your penis for a time, give yourselves a power trip or to keep telling yourselves that sex is D/s then you are not a true dominant as your email's stated but merely shallow men who are doomed to a world that is colored only in black and white. You will never truly live and you will be unfufilled.If you desire that hollow little world, you have come to the wrong website and trifled with the wrong woman.I have no qualm's in sharing who I am with you nor setting you straight with my opinion's.

I do appreciate your emails do NOT misunderstand me. It is through your writings to me, be them positive or negative that keep me firm and stand my ground as a submissive. So I thank you. I hope this blog entry has enlightened you rather than insulted. My website may be soft, frilly and serving no purpose to D/s to you.That is your right to believe that. I for one choose to see the art of life differently.

Thank you for your time and consideration. Have a wonderful day.

breath{MS} aka ~hoovsies~